I’m including the link to this article, “Oklahoma Parents Help Parents With Teens’ Addiction.” It is an interview with the co-founders of Parents Helping Parents, Pat and Vickie Nichols. The following three excerpted questions and answers will give you a preview of what you’ll find — I think the last one is especially important to understand.
Q: What have you found to be the biggest misconception about addiction?
A: The biggest misconception is most people do not understand or believe that it is a disease. … There is even confusion on this point within the profession of counseling. … New technology clearly indicates it is a brain disease; the brain is actually changed and altered.
Q: What are signs of addiction that parents should look for?
A: I think the two primary ones would be if the child no longer is interested in maintaining the respect from the parents, and he doesn’t care if his car privileges are taken away. By then you’ll see that there will be a drop in grades, his friends have changed, he’s no longer interested in social activities he once was very passionate about, like maybe it’s golf or wrestling or football or it could be church.
You see a behavior change in the way they dress, their attitude, continuing to break the family boundaries and they aren’t concerned about the consequences. And even if they pay the consequences, they’ll do it again. … Many parents also think they can smell the alcohol on them or they can tell if they’re using but that’s not necessarily true.
Q: If parents suspect their child is addicted, how aggressive should they be in getting to the truth?
A: What happens is a lot of parents continue to put discipline in place, but if the child is actually addicted, these discipline tactics simply won’t work. That would be their first clue that they’re dealing with something that needs to be taken to a different level. And that level would be a proper assessment. … I would take the child to a licensed alcohol and drug counselor, anyone with a CADC, certification of drug and alcohol counseling. They will be able to interview and do a proper test. … If I could go back and do it over again, that would be my first step. Then the counselor will be able to work with the family in creating the appropriate boundaries and consequences, based on the assessment and that sort of thing.
[The above three questions and answers are taken from the article referenced in the opening sentence.]
